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But. Man. When. It. Hits.? Oh. Boy.! Hooked. Up. With. This. Dude. Last. Month.! Total. Surprise. Package.! He’s. All. “Let’s. Keep. It. Casual”. –. I’m. Like. Hell. Yeah.! Felt. Like. A. King.! “I’m. Still. Here”. –. That’s. Me. After. That. Night.! Sex-dating’s. Got. Highs. Like. That.! Lows. Too. Tho.! Catfish. Are. Everywhere.! Saw. One. Profile. –. Pic. Was. A. Model.! Met. Her. –. Nope.! Looked. Like. My. Uncle. Gary.! Laughed. My. Ass. Off. Later.!

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First off, I head down to the market on Shchorsa Street. You know, the one where all the babushkas sell their homemade stuff? I’m just trying to grab some fresh veggies for my pigs. But nooo, the line is like a mile long! I’m standing there, tapping my foot, thinking, “C’mon, ladies, I got pigs to feed!”

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