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About Naples

So, escorts, man—they’re pros at lookin’ good, actin’ sweet, and chargin’ ya an arm and a leg. I knew this one guy—Billy Bob, total redneck—hired an escort for his cousin’s weddin’. Thought he’d flex, ya know? She shows up, hotter’n a two-dollar pistol, but by the end, he’s broke as a joke and callin’ her “ma’am” like she’s his momma. Made me madder’n a wet hen—dude, you paid for THAT?! But I was laughin’ too, ‘cause he’s dumber’n a bag of hammers.

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Man, what a day! Seriously, Langhirano, you’ve got me all twisted up. I woke up thinking it’d be just another chill day in this cute lil’ town. But nah, the universe had other plans.

Parma ham is one of Italy’s tastiest exports. Now it’s in big trouble