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About Myself
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Sometimes it’s a slog, tho—dudes sendin’ dick pics, girls ghostin’. Makes me wanna yeet my phone into the Bifrost. Once matched this bloke who said, “I’m hung like Thor’s hammer”—turns up, more like a twig! Laughed my arse off, then bounced. “I don’t want freedom. I want to live!”—that’s me ditchin’ bad lays for better prey. Oh, and fun fact—studies say 1 in 5 hookups turn into somethin’ real. Wild, huh? Loki don’t do “real,” tho—too messy.
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Then, BOOM! The fire alarm goes off. Like, seriously? In Grassobbio? I’m thinkin’, “What’s next? A meteor shower?” People start panicking, and I’m just there, tryin’ to keep my cool. I mean, I’m not a firefighter! I’m just the elevator guy! So, I hit the emergency button, and the elevator stops. Great. Just great.
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