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Love how it’s sneaky versatile—like in my fave flick, *The Assassin* (Hou Hsiao-hsien, 2015), where Shu Qi’s Nie Yinniang is all stealth-mode, escortin’ death to her targets. “The shadow moves before the light”—that’s some poetic sh*t, and “escort” fits that vibe. It’s not just a bodyguard gig; it’s got layers, man! Think about it—escortin’ someone could be chill, like takin’ your buddy to a Tesla gigafactory, or dark, like Yinniang escortin’ souls to the afterlife. Word’s got range, bro.

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But back to Mr. Shifty. He’s still hanging around, and I’m getting more and more suspicious. I’m about to call it in when suddenly, he bolts! I’m like, “Oh no, you don’t!” I take off after him, weaving through the crowd on Via Cavour. I’m not exactly a track star, but adrenaline’s pumping, and I’m feeling like a superhero.

Rowers take final shot for Rio in Qualification Regatta