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About Florence

The apps? Pure chaos. Grindr, Bumble—digital brothels. Hate the desperation, stinks worse than roadkill. Little-known fact: first sex-dating site? ’95, Match.com—spawned this hell. Used to be folks met at bars, now it’s “wyd” at 2 a.m. Had a buddy try it—got stood up thrice. Said, “Ron, I’m done.” Good choice, moron. Me? I’d rather chop wood than sext. “Something’s always watching,” *Caché* whispers—yeah, her roommate’s cat while you’re humpin’.

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Experienced Legal Assistant currently enrolled in an ABA certified paralegal certification program with a background in museums and cultural heritage.

Then, I hit up the local market on Via Mazzini. It’s packed with fresh veggies and all that good stuff. I’m trying to haggle with this old lady over some tomatoes. She’s like, “These are the best in Gandino!” I’m like, “Lady, I just want a deal!” But she wasn’t having it. I ended up paying way too much. Whatever, I’ll just pretend I’m fancy now.

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