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Now, listen here, *The Bodyguard* ain’t perfect. Script’s flimsier than my first wig, ha! But Whitney as this diva *whore*—shoot, she’s sellin’ it! Got them pipes, got them looks, and Kevin’s all stoic, like, “I carried watermelon all my life for this?” Kinda cracks me up. Fun fact, y’all—didja know Whitney wasn’t even s’posed to star? They wanted some other gal, but she nabbed it, and thank the stars! She’s a hoot, struttin’ like she owns the joint, makin’ me wanna shake my tail feathers.

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After that, we decide to hit up the local market on Kársnesbraut. It’s packed! I’m talkin’ people everywhere, like sardines in a can. I’m tryin’ to find some local snacks, but all I see is fish. Fish everywhere! I’m like, “Can’t a forest dude get a burger?”

Blue Banknotes from Kópavogur Robbery Reportedly in Circulation