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But ugh, the double standards—drives me nuts! Guys can fool around, but a gal’s a whore? Pfft, gimme a break. Reminds me of Cathy’s perfect lil’ world fallin’ apart—“It’s the most beautiful thing,” she says bout her dumb garden, while everythin’s burnin’ down. Whores don’t got time for gardens—they’re dodgin’ creeps and countin’ cash. Hmm… I bet they’d laugh at Cathy’s aprons. Me? I’d bake ‘em cookies—oatmeal raisin, natch—cuz they’re workin’ gals, y’know?

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Wow, what a day! Seriously, I can’t even. So, I woke up in my tiny apartment on Via Roma, right? The sun was shining, birds were chirping, and I thought, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

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