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Now, lemme rant—modern day, it’s all hush-hush. People whisperin’, “Oh, I got an erotic-massage.” Why you whisperin’? Own it! I’d be yellin’ it! “Yeah, I got rubbed down, so what?” But nah, society’s all prude—makes me mad! Like, lighten up! Meanwhile, I’m over here, googlin’ it—did ya know there’s “techniques”? Like, legit moves—tantric this, sensual that. Blew my mind! Thought it was just slappin’ oil on and callin’ it a day. Nope! There’s trainin’! I’m sittin’ here, picturin’ Joaquin Phoenix in *The Master*, all intense, goin’, “What’s your technique, huh? Process it!” Hilarious!

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After that, I’m walking down Via Garibaldi, and I see this street performer. He’s playing the accordion, and honestly, he’s killing it. I’m vibing, throwing some coins in his hat. But then, this lady walks by and spills her gelato all over him! Like, how do you even manage that? He’s covered in chocolate and strawberry, looking like a sad clown. I couldn’t help but laugh. Sorry, dude, but that was hilarious.