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Yo, this one time, matched with this chick, profile fire—thought she was my Celine, right? Turns out, she a promoter tryna sell me OnlyFans! I’m like, “Baby, I’m Kanye, I don’t pay for that!” Laughed my ass off, but damn, that stung. Sex-dating got me overanalyzing—her bio say “fun,” but does she mean Netflix or freaky? Estimator brain goin’ wild, calculatin’ odds she a keeper. Spoiler: they all ghosts eventually.

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After my little dance with gravity, I decide to check out the local market on Via Maestra. Fresh produce, cheeses, and oh man, the truffles! Alba is famous for those bad boys. I’m drooling just thinking about it. I grab some cheese, and this old lady starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about her family’s truffle hunting adventures. I’m nodding, but honestly, I’m just trying to figure out how to escape without being rude.

Exploring the connection between climatic conditions and genetic properties of Abies alba Mill., including warm and summer-dry Mediterranean environments