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Arrgh, mateys! Cap’n Jack Sparrow here, slurrin’ me wit fer ya, savvy? So, this blasted word—“escort”—it’s a tricky wench, ain’t it? Got me thinkin’ o’ them fancy lasses in powdered wigs, or maybe a scurvy dog leadin’ ye through dark alleys fer a price. Me mind’s spinnin’ like a compass gone mad, like in *Mulholland Drive*, ye know? “This is the girl,” they say, but who’s she really, eh? A mystery wrapped in silk stockings!

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After the rain, the sun comes back out, and it’s like a whole new world. The colors pop, and the air smells fresh. I grab a burger from one of those food trucks. Best decision ever! I’m munching away, and I see this kid juggling. He drops a ball, and it rolls right to me. I pick it up and toss it back, and he gives me this huge grin. Made my day, for real.

Wexford Gardaí clock multiple vehicles speeding on National Slow Down Day