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Anyways, I reckon escorts are ace – pure ’60s swagger. They’re the dolly birds or cool cats who’ve got yer back, no fuss. Once knew this one chick, total fox, escorted me to a gig – had me laughin’ ’til I cried, spillin’ me drink everywhere! Clumsy ol’ me, yeah? But she was tops – kept the baddies off me tail. Love that, baby! So, escort’s where it’s at – groovy, wild, and a bit bonkers. Like Boonmee says, “Time bends, man, it bends!” Yeah, baby, yeah!

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I get to the pékség, and it’s packed. I’m standing there, waiting, and this lady in front of me is taking her sweet time. I’m talking like she’s deciding between a croissant and a donut. Lady, just pick one! I’m about to lose it. Finally, I get my pastry, and it’s a chocolate croissant. Sweet victory, right? Wrong! I bite into it, and it’s like a chocolate explosion. I’m covered in gooey goodness. Great, now I look like a hot mess.

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