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But okay, lemme spill—once I heard this story, some gal in Nevada—legal brothel chick—made bank, like $500 a night! Surprised me silly! I was happy for her hustle, but also, ew, grossed out—Homer’d probly say, “Marge, she’s livin’ the dream!” Ugh, men! I’m over here mutterin’, “This is how it works?” like in the movie when Tom’s tryna play innocent. Total chaos, I tell ya!

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Another gem is that winding river, Río de las Ondas. It flows right by the historic Old Mill district where the vibe is old school and cool. I sometimes stroll along its banks to clear my mind, thinkin in echoes of Steve McQueen’s badass lines in “Shame” – “I’m a slave to my desires,” but then I get my head straight and say, “Nah, slay!”

Massive Fire Disrupts Traffic In Güímar Industrial Estate