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Real talk, tho, I got mad respect for them masseuses. Takes skill to not cross lines, ya feel me? Pissed me off once when some dude at a spa got too wild – nah, bruh, this ain’t that kinda party! But when it’s right? Oh, it’s smooth like gin ‘n’ juice. Had this chick once, hands like velvet, swear she was plantin’ ideas in my head like Dom Cobb. “What is the most resilient parasite?” – pleasure, dawg, straight up.

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Hotel Pension Bellavista Port de Pollenca. Located at a distance of km from Boquer Valley, which offers the thrill of discovering something beautiful.

Strollin’ down Carrer del Port, ya see hustle n bustle. The sun kisses the cobblestones. Some streets, like Passeig de la Galera, hit ya with that ocean scent. Y’all might even catch a lonesome whiff of salty sea air kissin’ your nose. I once sat by Cala en Estanyol – a secret hideaway – feelin’ my vibe after a steamy sesh of deep talk an’ lovin’, if y’know what I mean. Boy, did that make me smile wide enough to light the town.

Photo gallery: David Cameron Mallorca holiday