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About Diekirch

Found one near Vespucci Beach—tattooed, smokin’ hot, but glitchy. Kept callin’ me “Leonard”—wtf? Like “Memento,” she’s stuck in a loop. “I’ve seen you before,” she says. I’m like, “Bitch, I’m Vader!” Laughed my ass off—then she clipped into a wall. Typical GTA jank. Still, got me thinkin’—is she real? Am I real? “Remember Sammy Jankis,” my brain screams. Nolan’s fuckin’ with me even here.

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I can’t help but laugh. Mamer’s got its quirks, for sure. I finish my sandwich, and just as I’m about to head back, I hear this loud crash. I rush outside, and there’s a delivery truck that just backed into a lamppost. I’m like, “Dude, you had one job!” The driver’s all flustered, and I’m just standin’ there, shakin’ my head.

John Mamer