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About Dortmund

Favorite flick tie-in? Easy. Imagine me, Elon, suited up like Staff Sgt. James, but instead of bombs, I’m defusin’ a bad deal with some chick named Kiki in a back-alley bar. “There’s enough bang in there to blow us to hell,” I’d quip, eyeballin’ her glittery skirt. Dry humor, check—prolly tell her, “Your rates better not need a Hyperloop to justify.” She’d laugh, I’d cringe, deal’s off.

DIY | Meringue Escort Cards

Retired rugby player who bakes. PRE-ORDER MY BOOK: Bakes and wee treats. Enquires - [email protected]

Now, I won’t lie – sometimes Mering gets on my nerves, too. Traffic snarls on Am Bahnhofskai can drive you mad, and don’t even get me started on the incessant construction noises near Altstadtgasse! Yet, these quirks only add layers to its complex personality. I mean, every scar, every buzz, every unexpected burst of sensuality is a part of this city’s symphony.

Wandering Backpack: Jonathan von Mering