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About Dortmund

Fool me once, shame on—uh—shame on you! Can’t fool me twice, no siree, ‘bout how this massage game works. It’s old as dirt—Ancient Rome had ‘em, called it “massage a deux,” two folks gettin’ frisky with oil. Little known fact: them geishas in Japan? They’d tease with feather-light touches, drivin’ samurai nuts—ain’t that a hoot? Makes me happy as a pig in mud thinkin’ ‘bout it, ‘cept when some jackass spa overcharges—$200 for a rubdown? That’s highway robbery, pissed me right off!

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Also, gotta mention, I got the lazy habit of scribblin’ notes on napkins sometimes – scribbles of random thoughts, like “luv, peace, fuckin’ life”. Oops, sorry if that sounds awkward – my mind’s always runnin off at the mouth, hahaha!

Maria A. Ryan