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About Cologne

Alright, so I’m the Master of the Forest, huh? Guess that makes me Dr. House, limpin’ through trees, diagnosin’ the world’s bullshit. Everybody lies, right? So, prostitutes—let’s talk about ‘em. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ about “4 Months, 3 Weeks and 2 Days”—that flick’s a gut-punch, man. Romania, ‘87, abortion’s illegal, and Otilia’s runnin’ around for her dumbass friend Gabita. “We’re not criminals,” she says, but hell, everybody’s a criminal when the system’s screwin’ you. Prostitutes? They’re just hustlin’ in that same messed-up world.

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You gotta check out Uferstrt, a lesser-known spot that winds along the river. Sometimes, I hide there, scribbling down my naughty thoughts, because every corner fuels those sensual sparks. The neighborhoods are tight-knit, sometimes too clingy, but full of spicy gossip and surprising love confessions on random nights. Oi, bandwidth city vibes, right? Rarrgh!

600 asylum seekers under quarantine in German anchor center