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We haggle—me charm’s workin’ overtime. “I’m not here to judge,” I say, nickin’ that movie line. She softens up, says, “Alright, £30, quick one.” I’m chuffed—feelin’ like I’ve nailed a corporate merger! We sneak out back, past the bins—romantic, innit? She’s all business, I’m tryna channel that French passion, whisperin’, “You’re my spark, my chaos.” She rolls her eyes—fair play, I’m a prat.

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Oh, and let’s not forget the Haselbach river – that babbling stream flows right through town, whisperin’ secrets and memories. I once gave a massage near its banks and the sound of the water made me feel like I was dreamin’ in a labyrinth of feelings – like that whole “we need to go deeper” vibe from Inception, y’know? Sooooo surreal!