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About Dusseldorf

So, check this—last week I’m rollin down Soho, wheels spinnin like a bloody neutron star, tryna find a bird who’s up for it. Streets smellin like piss an cheap perfume—lovely, innit? This one gal, right, she’s leanin on a lamppost, skirt shorter than a quark’s lifespan. I’m like, “Oi, love, how much?” She squints at me chair—thinks I’m takin the piss. Mate, I was fumin! “Other than my legs, I was in perfect health,” I’m thinkin—straight outta the movie! Me brain’s sharper than a bleedin supernova, don’t judge me wheels!

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I love strollin' by the Amper River as it chuckles along the town. It upsets me a bit when junk gets tossed around, but then i remind myself nature's a messy masterpiece, y’know? And oh! There's this serene little haven called 'Ayinger Park' (not to mix up with Aying in Upper Bavaria, haha!) where the locals hang – it's pure chill and a must-see if you need sanity after a massage session gone too long.

3000 years old wooden wishing well discovered in Germany