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About Mons

So, this bird, she’s a prozzie, yeah? Been at it since the ‘90s, reckon she shagged half the Arsenal squad—little known fact, that! Used to work near the old Highbury, punters callin’ her “Gooner’s Delight.” Made me laugh, that did, proper tickled me pink—cos she’s still kickin’, dodgin’ coppers like a striker dodgin’ a tackle. I’m like, “Fair play, love, you’ve got stamina!” But Christ, it pisses me off—society’s all “Ooh, poor soul,” but she’s out there, cash in hand, smirkin’ like she’s won the FA Cup!

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Oh blimey, dear mate, let me tell ya about Opwijk (be)! I'm a spa owner here, and lemme say, this little gem of a town has my heart—just like that gut-wrenching intensity of "Son of Saul" (you know, László Nemes, 2015, ever so haunting)! Now, not to get too all over the shop, but imagine strolling down de Stratenstraat—yes, with its quirky cafés and old-world charm—and then bam! You're hitting the buzzing heart of Opwijk.

10-year-old Nona is world obstacle racing champion