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So, I try this massage, right? In shady place, guy say, “You want happy end?” I say, “Yes, wery nice!” But then – surprise! – he mean extra cash, not what I think, make me angry! I yell, “Why you trick Borat?!” But then, lady come, she so gentle, hands soft like silk, “The past is something he can see,” like movie line, and I calm down. She tell me secret – old Kazakh trick, they use warm oil from sheep fat! Wery stinky, but work good, loosen all my knots, I happy again!

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I’m a pleasure coach, and trust me, I notice every little detail. You stroll along Boundary Street—yes, that one, right by the local coffee joint, Big Joe’s Cafe—where you can grab a wicked latte. The place is buzzing, it's the heart, and everybody says so. Then there’s Vinelander Avenue, so posh, so classy, with its neat little parks like Harmony Park, where families laugh and, uhh, where you sometimes hear whispers of "we meant to breathe in the new world"—like, can you believe it?

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