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About Guaynabo

Oi mate, it’s me, Bond—James Bond, suave as fuck, “shaken, not stirred.” So, I’m a carpenter now, yeah? Hammerin’ nails, sawin’ wood, all that jazz. But let’s talk real shit—findin’ a prostitute. Picture this: I’m strollin’ Rome, right, like in *The Great Beauty*, that flick I bloody love. “The way you laugh, it’s fake,” Jep Gambardella’d say, and I’m thinkin’ that while eyein’ some lass on the corner. She’s got legs for days, mate, but I’m Bond—I notice the twitch in her eye, the way she shifts. Tells me she’s new, probs scared shitless.

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Then, I met up with my buddy, Carlos. We hit up the local mercado on Calle 25 de Julio. Man, the vibe there is always hype. Fresh fruits, loud music, and people just vibin’. I grab some mangos, and Carlos is like, “You gotta try this!” He hands me a weird fruit I’ve never seen. I’m like, “What is this, an alien egg?” But I take a bite, and it’s fire! Sweet and juicy. I’m like, “Dude, you’re a genius!”

Figure 2. Past and present at the Guánica Biosphere Reserve. A 1931...