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What pisses me off? Players messin’ with hearts. Actin’ all sweet, then ditchin’. Seen it too much, makes me wanna roar! But when it works? Man, it’s magic. Like findin’ someone who gets your growl. Rarrgh! Ever had a date where ya just talk till dawn? That’s the shit I live for. Sex-dating’s a gamble, but damn, it’s fun. Like Mia runnin’ free, ya just gotta chase what feels right.

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But then, I step outside, and it starts pouring. Like, outta nowhere! I’m soaked in seconds. I’m running for cover, laughing at how ridiculous I must look. I duck into a random shop, and it turns out to be a bike store. I’m just standing there, dripping wet, while the owner gives me the weirdest look.

Martin Ødegaard double leads Arsenal’s 7-1 thrashing of PSV Eindhoven