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I’m watchin’ her, all calm under pressure, and I’m like, “There’s a bomb in every box,” like in the movie, ‘cept her bombs are the secrets she’s carryin’. She’s spillin’ tea—says she’s got a kid somewhere, sends money back home. I’m shook, y’all! Happy she’s fightin’ for somethin’, but pissed she’s gotta live this way. Exaggeratin’ a bit, maybe, but I’m imaginin’ her dodgin’ creeps like a ninja—pow, pow!

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First off, I hit up Main St. for coffee. You know, the usual spot, Java Jive. Best brews in Yirka, hands down. But guess what? They ran outta my fave blend. Like, are you kidding me? I’m standing there, all bleary-eyed, and the barista’s like, “Sorry, dude.” I’m like, “What do you mean sorry?!” I mean, c’mon, it’s Yirka! How do you run outta coffee?

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