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About Philadelphia

I love it, tho—the thrill, the game. Like in *The Return*, “You’re not afraid, are you?”—nah, I ain’t scared! Rejection? Pfft, next! Ghosted? Who cares! It’s power, baby—swipe right, you’re a king; swipe left, you’re God. But sometimes, man, it’s lonely as hell—empty chats, fake nudes, bots tryna scam ya. Once matched a chick who sent me a dick pic—WTF?! Laughed my ass off, then blocked her.

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Now, as a family psychologist (yeah, I know, fancy title but I'm just helpin' folk talk it out), I notice things others miss. Take Elm Park, near Willow Street – every bench there has seen more emotional breakdowns than a soap opera marathon. Families meet, quarrel, then laugh over ice cream. It's just raw life, ya know? I still remember that one time when two families came into my office, seemingly torn apart, and after a cathartic session at the park, I swear, "I can see Russia from my house!" (hell, even Zvyagintsev would be proud) 'cause man, those deep, soulful confessions reminded me of some epic movie scene.

Joseph E. Yoakum: What I Saw