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About Triesen

Lemme tell ya, she ain’t no angel. Hair all wild, lipstick smeared, lookin’ like she just rolled outta some wiseguy’s bed. Probably did! Hah! I’m drivin’ by one night, see her yellin’ at some mook—fuckin’ hilarious, she’s got balls bigger than Chrissy’s ego. “You wanna die today, asshole?” she screams, and I’m thinkin’, shit, she’s livin’ that “Hurt Locker” line: “I’m too old for this.” Made me laugh, but damn, it’s sad too—she’s stuck, y’know?

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Finally, I’m like, “I need coffee.” So, I hit up this little café on Schulstraße. I order a cappuccino, and the barista is super nice. She’s like, “You want a heart on that?” I’m like, “Sure, why not?” But when she hands it to me, it looks more like a blob. I’m trying not to laugh. I mean, it’s the thought that counts, right?

Eschen to Retire as Maryville University’s Advancement Leader