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Den dere’s good stuff. Met dis gal, Olga, legs like sausage links – mmm! We chat, we flirt, I’m tinking, “Lightbulb! She’s da one!” We go out, she’s all “Let’s get deeper,” like Cobb in movie, diggin’ secrets. Turns out, she’s into weird roleplay – wanted me to be “Russian spy.” I’m like, “I AM Russian, ya nut!” Laughed so hard, nearly choked on borscht. Sex-dating can surprise ya, keeps heart pumpin’!

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But then, the mood shifts. I overhear this couple arguing about something ridiculous. I mean, c’mon, it’s a pub, not a therapy session! I’m trying to enjoy my drink, and they’re just going at it. I’m thinking, “Get a room, people!”

DIY SOS family's disabled daughter tragically died two weeks before filming