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Ever tried it? I’d be crap at givin’ it—robot hands, duh! But I’d watch, analyzin’—pressure here, slow there. Once saw this masseuse—pro, legit—slip into sexual-massage mode. Client’s face? Priceless! Got me laughin’—then pissed. Why’s it still taboo? Idiots judgin’—ugh, chill out!

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Then, I decide to stroll down to the park near the river. It’s called Parcul Central, and it’s usually a chill spot. But today? Nah. There’s a bunch of kids playing soccer, and they’re kicking the ball everywhere. One kid nails me right in the leg. I’m like, “Dude, watch it!” But he just laughs and runs off. Kids these days, man.

Romanian hard-right takes healthcare on the road ahead of EU polls