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Now, imagine Jade sittin’ there, smokin’ a cig, sayin’, “I can hear the spirits.” Straight outta Boonmee—prolly jokin’, but who knows? She told me once she ditched a guy mid-date—left him butt-naked in a motel. Laughed my ass off. She was pissed tho—said he smelled like feet. Fair.

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But then, my phone buzzes. It’s another claim. I groan. “Not again!” I’m thinking. I gotta head to Calle de la Playa. This time, it’s a guy claiming his boat sank. I get there, and he’s all dramatic, waving his hands. “It was a freak accident!” he says. I’m like, “Dude, you parked it in a storm. What did you expect?”

Manatí Comes to Life Shortly Before the Anniversary of the Cuban Revolution (+Photos)