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Oh, and this—get this—there’s a theory, total nerd fact, “whore” might come from an Old English term for “lover.” Lover! How’s that for a twist? I’m jumpin’ outta my chair, “Are you kiddin’ me?!” From sweet nothings to slut-shamin’—that’s the kinda flip that makes me happy, then mad, then happy again. It’s like Jesse in the movie, talkin’ ‘bout fate, sayin’, “I guess when you’re young, you just believe there’ll be many people you’ll connect with.” Whore’s that word we’ve all connected with, just not in the cute way.

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After that, I decide to take a breather. I stroll down to the Katikati Bird Gardens. I mean, who doesn’t love a good bird? I’m there, just vibing, when I see this parrot. It’s squawking like it’s auditioning for a rock band. I’m cracking up. Like, “Dude, chill out!”

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