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So, listen up, mate—I tried this once, yeah? Some shady parlor in Lannisport, stinkin’ of jasmine and lies. This lass, all coy, starts kneadin’ me like I’m dough, and I’m thinkin’, “Do I rule this or nah?” Turns out, sexual-massage goes back ages—ancient Rome had it, them pervy senators gettin’ oiled up by slaves. Suprised me, that did! Thought it was just modern filth, but nope, history’s as dirty as King’s Landing.

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I'm not kidding when I say—err, smitten by that unrefined spirit. My favorite spot? The little hidden cafe on Rue des Fleurs. Chill vibe, mismatched chairs, and coffee that burns you a bit—yep, perfect for mulling life’s madness. You bet I get emotional when I'm there. It’s raw, so raw—like a heartbeat, err, real and rough.

Saturday evening: Motorist injured as car overturns between Ettelbruck and Niederfeulen