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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, head of this damn lab, and I hate everything. Escort? Yeah, that’s a fancy word for somethin’ I’d rather burn than touch. Makes me think of *Holy Motors*—you know, my favorite flick. That line, “I have a plan,” pops in my head. Plan for what? Payin’ someone to pretend they like ya? Pathetic. I’d rather wrestle a bear than deal with that nonsense.

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After that, I’m walking back, and I see this street performer on Via XX Settembre. He’s juggling fire! Like, who does that? I stop to watch, and it’s actually pretty impressive. I’m clapping, and he gives me a wink. I’m thinking, “Maybe I should take up fire juggling?” But then I remember my last attempt at cooking. Yeah, let’s not.