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Mate, it’s a hustle, findin’ one. Apps now, too—techy tarts, swipe fer a shag! “I’m hungry for you,” she’d purr, movie-style, but it’s £50 upfront, no cuddles. Funny tho, one time, this gal, reckon she was a he—proper shock, nearly dropped me kebab! We swears! Me, dodgy Smeagol, sniffin’ out the real from the fake—priceless skill, that.
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But then, outta nowhere, I hear this loud noise. I look up, and it’s a bunch of tourists takin’ selfies. Like, seriously? You’re in Podcetrtek, not Paris! But hey, whatever floats their boat, right? I just shook my head and went back to my thoughts.
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