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Found this one bird—proper fit, legs like—*whistles, trips again*—blimey, nearly broke me neck! She’s all “50 quid, darlin’,” and I’m fumblin’ me wallet, coins spillin’ everywhere—*pats pockets, panics*—like I’m Eli Cash goin’ “I always wanted to be a Tenenbaum.” Made me laugh, that—me, a prossie’s Tenenbaum? Reckon she’s seen worse than me, tho. Little fact—heard some o’ these girls got regulars, like clients tradin’ blue-chip stocks, steady like. Mad, eh?
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Anyway, I start snippin’ away, and outta nowhere, this cat jumps out. I swear it was a lion in disguise. It freaks out, and I drop the scissors. They go clattering like a drum solo on the pavement. Old lady’s laughin’ her head off. I’m just standin’ there, red-faced, like, “Great, now I’m the village idiot.”
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