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About Caguas

Hiya, buddy! Me, Patrick Star, guitar master, gonna blab about sexual-massage! Duuuude, it’s wild, like—whoa! You ever try strummin’ a body like a guitar? That’s sexual-massage, bro! I saw this flick, *Uncle Boonmee Who Can Recall His Past Lives*, total mind-blower, right? Boonmee’s all, “I recall my past lives,” and I’m like, “Duuuude, did ya get a sexy rubdown in one?” Hahaha, imagine that—past-life massage!

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So, I’m hustling down Calle de la Paz, right? I’m dodging people, dodging dogs, and then BAM! I step in a puddle. Not just any puddle, but the biggest, muddiest one ever. My shoes? Ruined. I was like, “Great, just great!” But then I saw this little kid laughing at me. I couldn’t help but laugh too. Kids have a way of making everything better, ya know?

Ex-Con Jailed for Allegedly Shooting Up Santa Ysabel Gas Station