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Oh, and get this—there’s this trick with hot stones in some erotic-massage joints. Little known fact: they heat ‘em just right, plop ‘em on ya, and it’s like your whole body’s screamin’, “Hallelujah!” I tried it once—okay, maybe I didn’t, but I WANT to! Sounds sexy as heck, don’t it? Like Carol sayin’, “I miss you,” but it’s your muscles missin’ them stones!

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After that, I decide to stroll down Jalan Merdeka. It’s a beautiful street, lined with trees and cute cafes. I pop into this little place called Kopi Labuha. Best coffee ever! I order a cappuccino, and the barista is super chill. We start chatting about the city, and he tells me about this hidden waterfall nearby. I’m intrigued!

Spicy dive-trip to Halmahera