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I ain’t judgin’, honey—takes guts to do that! Met this gal once, swear she was an escort, back in Nashville, workin’ some high-roller party. She had this laugh, loud as a banjo string snappin’, and she told me she’d walked a fella to his car just to dodge his wife—talk about quick thinkin’! Made me giggle ‘til my sides hurt. Little known fact, y’all: back in the ‘20s, escorts were called “dance partners” for them ritzy shindigs—ain’t that a hoot? Sashayin’ for a dollar, same as now, just with worse hairdos.

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Anyway, I shake it off. I mean, it’s just a little coffee, right? I head over to the Hahoe Mask Museum. Masks everywhere! I’m snapping pics like a tourist. I see this one mask that looks like my ex. LOL, I almost died laughing. But then, I get all emotional thinking about my love life. Like, why can’t I find a guy who appreciates a good mask?

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