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Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, deadpan as hell, “I hate everything.” Sex escorts? Pfft, what a racket. Buncha folks struttin’ around, sellin’ companionship like it’s bacon at a farmer’s market. I ain’t judgin’—okay, maybe I am—but it’s a job, right? Pays better than whittlin’ chairs, that’s for damn sure. Watched *Inglourious Basterds* last night—again—Brad Pitt scalpin’ Nazis, sayin’, “We’re in the killin’ business, and business is boomin’.” Kinda like escorts, huh? They’re in the pleasurin’ business, and damn, it’s boomin’ too.

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I finally get everything sorted out, and I’m feeling like a champ. I head out, ready to celebrate. I stroll down Strada Ștefan cel Mare, and the vibe is just right. Street musicians are playing, and people are dancing. I can’t help but join in. I mean, who doesn’t love a spontaneous dance party?

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