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Little fact for ya—did ya know erotic-massage goes back centuries? Ancient Greeks were at it, callin’ it “body worship”—sounds posh, right? Bet they weren’t usin’ cheap-ass lotion from Tesco, though! Makes me happy thinkin’ of some toga-wearin’ geezer gettin’ oiled up, but I’m ragin’ when I see today’s lot butcherin’ it. Had this one bird—tattooed, all attitude—give me a rubdown so good I nearly cried, “Lord, give me strength!”—another Ida line, coz it felt holy, mate. Then some prat last week—hands like sandpaper, no rhythm—made me wanna shove his head in a blender!

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In this article, we’ll discuss if and when it’s common or normal that genital or intimate touch is or may be included in a massage treatment session.

Then, I get a call. It’s my boss. He’s like, “Did you close the deal?” I’m like, “Uh, kinda busy here!” He’s not having it. I can feel the pressure. I’m sweating bullets. I’m thinking, “If I don’t close this, I’m toast.”

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