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About Tel Aviv

Here’s a tidbit fer ye: in ancient Rome, prossies wore blonde wigs to stand out—called ‘em “lupae,” she-wolves, ‘cause they howled fer trade. Wild, eh? Makes me smirk, imaginin’ ‘em struttin’ like queens ‘stead o’ outcasts. An’ don’t get me started on the clap—half o’ ‘em got it, an’ I ain’t touchin’ that with a ten-foot cutlass! “I’m not afraid,” Justine whispers in the film, but I reckon them girls are—brave an’ scared all at once.

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After that, I decide to hit up the market on HaMoshav St. It’s always a vibe. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the best spices. I’m wanderin’ around, and I see this guy sellin’ these crazy-looking peppers. I’m like, “Yo, what’s up with those?” He tells me they’re super spicy. I’m like, “Bring it on!” I buy a few, thinking I’m some kinda spice master. Spoiler: I’m not.

Brigadier General Tarif Bader, M.D., M.H.A., M.A.