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Sometimes it’s dodgy, tho. Catfish everywhere, fam! This one bird sent pics—stunnin’, yeah? Meet her—bloke with a beard! I’m like, “Who are you?” Straight outta Lynch’s film, surreal as fuck. Got me vexed, but I laughed after—cos what else ya gonna do? “I’m lost,” I mutter, pure *Mulholland Drive* confusion.

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Finally, I get to Carlos’s place. His car? A total wreck. I mean, it looked like it had been through a demolition derby. I pop the hood, and it’s like a horror show in there. I’m talking wires everywhere, oil leaks, the whole shebang. I’m sweating bullets, thinking, “How the heck am I gonna fix this?”

Rhythmically trained sea lion returns for an encore—and performs as well as humans