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Dunno, mate, sometimes I’m knackered from wardening, yellin’ at cons, and I’m like – why ain’t I the one gettin’ rubbed down? Total piss-take. Imagine me, sprawled out, some bird quotin’ *The Assassin* – “the way is lost” – while she’s sortin’ me knots. Reckon I’d exaggerate it in me head, like I’m a bleedin’ king, not a warden. Hah! Erotic-massage ain’t just filth – it’s art, innit? Sneaky, sexy art. What’s yer take, eh? Fancy a go?

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But then, something unexpected happened. One of the teens tripped and fell right into the lake! I couldn’t help but laugh. Like, karma, dude! They were all soaked, and I was just sitting there, trying to hold back my laughter.

[Korea travels] Earth, wind, water and sunsets: Ansan’s coastal islands have a little of everything