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Ay, Gabagool? Ova here! So, escort, huh? Lemme tell ya, it’s a freakin’ trip. I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ ‘bout them girls, right? Like in “Toni Erdmann”—“Life’s just a big fart!”—it’s messy, weird, real. Escorts, they’re hustlin’, makin’ cash, dodgin’ creeps. I knew this chick, Angie, from Jersey—total pro. She’d roll up, all classy, but bam—cops nabbed her once. Said she slipped ‘em a fake ID, ballsy as hell. Made me laugh, like, “Who does that?”

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Finally, I hop on the bus, and it’s packed. I’m squished between this dude blasting music on his phone and an old man who smells like he’s been through a war. I’m trying to zone out, but the dude next to me keeps singing along. I can’t help but laugh. It’s like a bad karaoke night.

Allied Air Command | Latvia prepares NATO Baltic Air Policing take-over