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About Triesenberg

Alright, listen up, ya filthy animals. I’m Ron Swanson, hate everything, ‘specially prostitutes. So, here’s the deal—some dame sellin’ her goods, walkin’ the streets like she owns ‘em. Makes me mad, real mad. All that struttin’, stinkin’ of cheap perfume, ugh. Reminds me of “Tabu”—that flick I love. “She had a lover in every port,” they said. Yeah, this chick probably does too. Disgusting. Skirt hiked up, lips redder than a baboon’s ass—sorry, ape’s ass, whatever. Point is, she’s out there, hustlin’, and I’m over here, judgin’.

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, seriously? I’m drenched in seconds. I’m laughing, though, because it’s just typical. I mean, it’s Triesenberg, right? The weather’s as unpredictable as my life.

She survived flesh-eating bacteria; now Grand Rapids-area woman helps educate others