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But then—oh, then—I matched with this guy, total freak. Said he’s into “roleplay,” wanted me to be his “prey.” I’m thinkin’, buddy, I’m the one who bites! Told him, “In my dreams, I’m free,” straight from *The Pianist*, and he’s like, “huh?” No culture, no taste—next! Sex-dating’s a jungle, man, full of weirdos and posers. Did ya know, back in the ‘90s, people used newspaper ads for this shit? “SWM seeks SWF”—so retro, so desperate. Cracks me up thinkin’ about it.

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Then, I see this street performer on the corner of Kálvin tér. He’s juggling flaming torches, and I’m like, “Dude, you’re gonna set yourself on fire!” But he’s nailing it, and the crowd’s loving it. I’m clapping, feeling all inspired, when suddenly, BAM! One of the torches goes flying! It lands right next to me. I’m like, “Nope, not today!” I dodge it like I’m in the Olympics.

Men From Hajdúhadház and Hajdúböszörmény Wanted to Force Four Girls Into Prostitution