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About Palmerston North

So, listen up, padawan—sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs. Tension it releases, sneaky-like, in places ya didn’t expect. Little fact, hmm? Ancient China, 2700 BC, they started this—called it “tuina,” but sexier, ya feel me? Not some fancy spa shit, nah, real deal stuff. Made me happy, thinkin’ how old this trick is, still kickin’!

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First off, I hit up the local café on Great North Rd. You know, the one with the best flat whites? Yeah, that one. I ordered my usual, and the barista, bless her heart, totally messed it up. I mean, how do you mess up a flat white? It was like drinking a cloud of disappointment. I was like, “C’mon, mate! I need caffeine, not a sad latte!” But whatever, I chugged it down anyway.

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