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So, sex escorts – high rollers pay big, thousands sometiems, for a night of “companionship.” Makes me laugh, ‘cause companionship? Pfft, it’s a transaction, dude! You’re rentin’ a fantasy, not a fuckin’ soulmate. I got pissed once – this chick charged me double, said it’s ‘cause I’m “intense.” Intense? Bitch, I’m Gordon fuckin’ Gekko! Greed is good, but overchargin’ ain’t! Still, I paid – ‘cause the game’s the game.

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Then, just when I think it can’t get worse, my buddy Ahmed shows up late. He’s supposed to help me, but he strolls in like he’s on a catwalk. I’m like, “Dude, we’re milking cows, not modeling!” He just laughs and says, “Fashionably late, my friend.” Ugh, I could’ve used a little less fashion and a lot more help.

Amiri Decree appoints Sheikh Abdullah Al-Salem as new Minister of Defense