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Still, some of em, they own it. Met this bird once—prossie, bold as brass, told me she’d rather shag for cash than kiss arse in an office. Fair play, I say! Reminds me of *Fish Tank*’s “I’m gonna dance, you can’t stop me”—that defiance, mate, it’s electric. Makes me happy, seein’ em take control, even if it’s messy. Messy’s real, yeah? An’ I’m sittin’ here, sippin’ my tea, thinkin’—would I judge her? Nah, I’d toast her liver instead— “I ate his liver with fava beans,” ha!

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First off, I hit up the local market on Fő utca. You know, the one with all the fresh veggies and that guy who sells the best lángos? Yeah, that guy. I’m there, just minding my own business, when I spot this old lady. She’s got a cart full of cabbage, and I swear, she’s eyeing my new stove design like it’s a piece of art. I’m like, “Lady, it’s just a stove!” But she’s all, “That’s a fine piece of work, young man.” I’m blushing, but also thinking, “What do you know about stoves?”

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