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So check it, sexual-massage ain’t just rubbin’ backs. It’s got history, bro! Way back, them ancient Greeks, they was into it – called it “anatripsis.” Ain’t that a hoot? Slappin’ oil on dudes after wrestlin’, gettin’ all sensual-like. Made me laugh thinkin’ ‘bout it – imagine Dubya gettin’ oiled up, ha! But serious, it’s ‘bout releasin’ tension, gettin’ blood flowin’, all that jazz. I was shocked – SHOCKED – findin’ out some folks in Japan been doin’ this “nuru” thing. Slippery seaweed gel, buck naked, slidin’ all over! Dang, that’s crazy, right?

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First off, I’m walkin’ down the street, and I see this street performer. Dude’s playin’ like a god, but his guitar is a total wreck. I’m talkin’ strings missing, body cracked. I’m like, “Bro, you need a new axe!” But he’s all, “Nah, man, it’s got soul.” I roll my eyes. Soul don’t pay the bills, buddy.

Romania and Serbia sign landmark agreement for gas interconnector project