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Me favorite film, “The Headless Woman,” yesss—Verónica, she’s all lost, confused, bangin’ her head, seein’ things. Erotic-massage is like that, precious—hands touchin’, you don’t know what’s real, “What did I do?” she says, heh! Feels good, but sneaky, makes yer head spin, like Verónica drivin’ in fog, mmm! Once, in old times, docs used it—called it “hysteria cure” for ladies, vibin’ ‘em up, true story! Made me laugh, them stiff hobbits in coats, “It’s medicine, yesss!” Bollocks!

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Then I decided to check out the local shops on the High Street. Man, it’s a mix of everything. You got your classic charity shops, a few trendy boutiques, and then there’s that one shop that sells weird knick-knacks. I found a rubber chicken. I mean, who buys that? But I couldn’t resist. I bought it. It’s now my new best friend.

Archie Gray shows true colours as Pascal Stuijk makes Leeds United transfer demand - 'sign him'